Sunday, September 8, 2013

Deer Invade the Carrot Patch

At last -- harvest time on top of our picnic table.  That’s where I planted Karen’s 33 carrot anniversary gift.  It’s been a bit of a learning process en route to the climax of this new endeavor for us.  And so, our knowledge base has increased on at least five fronts.

1.  Carrot seeds are really tiny so it’s easy to dump a whole bunch into a small hole in the ground.  Consequently, when they poke their cute little heads up, no matter how much you feel the life of every living thing on earth is sacred, you need to pull out all but one in each little spot where you want to see a big carrot emerge.  The alternative -- lots of micro-carrots.

2.  You have to round up a whole bunch of buckets of sand, muskeg and kelp to make dirt around here.

3.  A heavy raised container filled with enough of that dirt to plant an acre of Iowa corn pretty much takes up the top of a picnic table.  So, don’t plan on fine outdoor summer picnics if you want leisurely dining to occupy the same space as your garden.

4.  Don’t plan on eating all the carrots you grow, even if you position your carrot patch on top of your picnic table so deer can’t reach them.  Why?  Occasionally during winter months when deer that are foundering through deep snow longingly gaze at Karen with pleading brown eyes, a carrot or two has ended up bouncing off their heads as she hurls “flocks” of carrots out the window.  Just occasionally!

Thus, like the nine lepers who did not return to thank Jesus for healing them, those deer are unlikely to return to thank you for their winter sustenance.  Instead, since they’ve learned to relish organic carrots and they have legs they know how to use, you’ll find seats on your picnic table make an excellent launch pad for rogue deer.

5.  After you’ve discovered the cervidine theft and built a barricade roughly equivalent to the Great Wall of China around your surviving carrots, don’t harvest the survivors the next day especially when you’re about to take off on a road trip and there won’t be anyone around to eat them. 

Karen and I will be discussing the virtues and possible negative aspects of gardening throughout the coming winter. 


Karen's 33-carrot patch wasn't alone during the assault of the Cervidae.  Terry and Sandy's nasturtiums suffered a similar fate.

                                                       But, they're so cute.

                                               Or, in some instances, regal.

              And those pleading eyes in winter.  They're more than Karen can endure.

After hours of hard labor, Karen admires our winter's carrot supply.  Oh, but they taste so good!

Incidentally the only effort we’ve made to check on the status of our potatoes was when Karen yanked on one vast potato stem   Seeing just bare roots with a couple of swellings, she proclaimed failure.  I suggested that any potatoes might possibly have broken off from the roots -- that  the term dig potatoes is not without meaning.  We’ll see in mid October when we return from a road trip down to America.

3 comments:

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  2. Amazing :). They're very regal and adorable, Karen too for sharing :)!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks Anon and Dana. Karen is the photographer on all but the last one.

    ReplyDelete

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